From analysis of the Yankees’ consistently inconsistent play and the effect of Roger Clemens’ “fatigued groin” on the pitching staff, to the latest chapter in the life and times of Alex Rodriguez, this past week featured an explosion of Yankee news that won’t be forgotten any time soon.

Looking at everything that occurred, I decided it would be fruitless — and potentially a disservice to you, the readers and feedback generators — to isolate just one of these issues. So, I’m taking on as many as possible, as succinctly as I can.

GAME/TEAM NEWS
It was a typical week for the 2007 Yankees in terms of performance. They lost two of three in Toronto and won two of three in Boston. True to form, two victories were of the “squeaker” variety, due to cushy early leads being wasted. Wednesday in Toronto, Tyler Clippard nearly squandered a 5-0 first-inning lead, and Sunday, Andy Pettitte lost a 4-0 lead before an unlikely comeback against Hideki Okajima and Jonathan Papelbon. The deservedly maligned Yankee bullpen isn’t entirely to blame for the choke jobs, but unless someone can come in and stop the bleeding when a starter falters, winning games will remain an arduous process.

Two of the three losses were just ugly. The New York Post reported that corpses who emerged to watch the games at some of the sports bars in the New York area exclaimed, “Damn, we’ve got more life than that.” The seventh inning of Saturday’s loss at Fenway could be ranked with some of the worst in recent team annals. It was like the Yankees were reenacting Phase 1 of the Sports Movie formula – they were the ragtag bunch of guys bungling their way around the diamond. The only problem is, with a payroll exceeding $200 million and expectations loftier than that, there’s nothing loveable about a team putting forth that kind of effort.

STORIES OF THE WEEK

1. The Life and Times of Alex Rodriguez
2. The Life and Times of Roger Clemens and His Groin
3. The Milagro Beanball War
4. Hal Be Sure

Let’s address these one at a time. First, A-Rod. Where to begin? Since when are photos of a professional athlete carousing with exotic dancers and gossipy stories of alleged adultery by said professional athlete a big deal? The idea of athletes acting on a morally higher plain because they should be role models is a fallacy — or is it phallusy? It’s not news. We as fans have made it clear that we care more about his popping up with the tying run on third and one out in the top of the 7^th at Fenway than we do about his popping up at the Brass Rail or the Hustler Club at the top of the morning.

But even for A-Rod, the insanity reached new heights. Bill Madden smartly questioned A-Rod’s reasons for allowing himself to be seen, and wondered why the Yankees would want to burden themselves with all the agita and b.s. that would likely come with signing him to an extension. The New York Sun’s Tim Marchman turned around and killed Madden for sounding like he was above gossip, which was an interesting rebuttal. People I talked to following his Little League move in Wednesday’s victory passed it off as no big deal, but my gut reaction was, “What a bush-league play. What is he, 12?” That the New York Times joined the party in highlighting Rodriguez’s questionable base-running indiscretions, should tell you something. Sports business columnist Richard Sandomir compared A-Rod’s actions to those of Lindsay Lohan, sans rehab.

Blue Jays shortstop John McDonald saying that A-Rod’s move was a reason he’ll never be a “real Yankee” brought that sentiment back after an eight-month hiatus. Steve Goldman has denounced the “real Yankee” argument, writing on umpteen occasions in the Pinstriped Bible and the Pinstriped Blog that once a player joins the big club and puts on the uniform, he’s a “real Yankee.” As much as I respect my former YES colleague, I’m inclined to disagree with him on this point. There’s a behavioral line that denotes “real Yankees” and everyone else. Would Mattingly have shouted behind Howie Clark to prevent him from catching the pop-up? Would Jeter? Would O’Neill, Posada, Murcer or Munson? No. There’s a difference between hard-nosed baseball and being a jackass.

I was disappointed that Bob Lorenz didn’t do a better job of setting up Ken Singleton and John Flaherty for a similar comment. It was clear to me that neither broadcaster said what he felt in that brief moment of Wednesday’s postgame. To their credit, however, they didn’t defend A-Rod.

In the New York Sun, Goldman suggests it’s time for the Yankees to decide whether to keep A-Rod to win now, or turning his bargaining-chip status into a potential goldmine of prospects.

To me, the most embarrassing element of “A-Rod 24/7” from a media standpoint was the result of Anthony McCarron’s story on Joe Torre rethinking A-Rod’s “Ha” call in Toronto. The headline “Torre Tells A-Rod: SHUT UP!” was not only misleading, it was inaccurate, hurtful and a discredit to a good writer in McCarron. McCarron was the News’s Yankee beat writer for several years before Sam Borden took over in 2005, and Mark Feinsand this year. The headline writer and night editor could have easily recognized or remembered that fact and kept it in mind before OKing the headline. A manager not as media savvy as Torre might have blamed McCarron and threatened never to talk to him again in a professional setting. Torre was going to boycott the media altogether on Saturday because of the flap, but he faced the horde and blasted the News’s irresponsible journalistic act. (And yes, even though the Daily News is a tabloid, there’s still journalistic integrity involved.) 

I’ve been on both sides of this, having worked more than 1,000 games over the four major sports both in my 6 ½ years working editorial. It’s embarrassing to be responsible for your organization getting called out by anyone, let alone a consistent source. I’ve written misleading headlines on the homepage and rewrote misleading headlines in my colleague’s pieces when editing them. My colleagues have erred in the same manner. More often than not, it’s a misinterpretation of the content, rather than a deliberate attempt to be hurtful. In this case, the Daily News, in trying to steal some thunder from the Post breaking the Stray-Rod A-Dultery, gave the impression of an intentional twisting of Torre’s quotes and got carried away in providing a salacious headline to sell papers.

Regarding the process, beat writers do not title their stories; a paper’s headline writers do. The backpage headline is usually decided by the lead night editor. At YES, we did things differently. We titled our own stories, whether we were reporting on-site or providing feature content. We also had to be extra careful, due to the ever-present possibility that someone in the organization would see what was posted, for fear of reprimand by the Yankees.

Real quick hits on the other items on the “Stories of the Week” list:

• The word “desperate” is being uttered by Yankee players to describe the state of affairs, and where Roger Clemens fits into the mix. Between his fatigued, scar tissue-ridden groin and A-Rod’s exploits, two of the Yankees’ highest paid players have become a d— joke. While it’s clear the Yankees won’t consider making this move, Joel Sherman wonders if the Yankees would be better off exercising their injury-related opt-out clause in Clemens’ contract and investing in the future.

• Nothing would have come of the hit batsmen in Friday’s game had Scott Proctor not brushed Kevin Youkilis’s teeth with a fastball in the bottom of the ninth inning with the game well in hand. Here’s where ESPN still excels: on Saturday morning’s SportsCenter, a graphic displayed the number of hit batsmen in Yankees-Red Sox series (I believe it was since 2000 or 2002 — anyone who saw the graphic, please shoot a note below). Red Sox 43, Yankees 67. Of those 67 Yankees hit, Jeter has been plunked 11 times, while David Ortíz has been hit only once.

• Steinbrenner the Youngest is taking over the family business when the patriarch abdicates his rule, according to Bill Madden. (He had a good week, huh?) Madden reports that 38-year-old Hal Steinbrenner prefers to keep a low profile, detests the media and will stay in Tampa, traveling to New York a couple of times a month to evaluate the team. Madden intimated that Torre and Brian Cashman are safe for now, but if Hal maintains supervision of the team from Tampa upon ascending to principal ownership, it’s logical to think the Tampa management faction will return as the dominant voice in the organization.

 Waiting for Roger. Until next week …