CHUTZPAH

Chutzpah. That’s what New York fans were treated to on Friday night by two old buddies, David Cone and Boomer Wells. Cone started against the Expos out at Shea. My boss offered me two tickets at the end of the day on Friday. “You want to go to the Mets game?”

I looked at him incredulously and said, “Talk to me in the middle of May, thank you very much.”

It was a cold, rainy and generally miserable night for baseball in Queens. Boomer Wells was pitching in Tampa Bay, in a domed stadium, if that’s what you want to call it. It looks like a glorified indoor stickball court. I assume the temperature in a place like that is 75 and comfy. Cone was the story of the night, but since I’m a Yankee fan, I flipped back and forth between the two games.

Wells looked like ass in the first inning, but escaped only allowing 1 run home. But I mean he literally looked like a man’s ass out there. Cold and clamy. I was watching the game with my brother Benny Eggs, who turned to me and said, “Hey, how come Wells gets to have a mustache?”

7 innings later, when Wells left the game with a 12-1 cushion, we had our answer. Cause that bum can pitch. He’s funny to watch because he throws strikes, so guys put the ball in play. Especially a young, aggresive team like Tampa Bay. But these guys are popping up to right all night.

Wells looks like he should be getting rocked and all of a sudden it’s the 7th inning and hardly anyone has scored.

Meanwhile, Cone was his old dramatic self at Shea. Cone struck out Vlad Guerrero on a splitter in the dirt in the first inning, and then faced the Expos slugger again with the bases loaded in the third. Cone had walked Jose VIdro to get to Vlad, and it was as if Cone said, ‘Let’s make this really interesting.’ Guerrero, taking enormous hacks, worked the cout to 2-2, when Cone dropped a breaking ball right passed him. Vlad swung and missed and my brother and I both jumped up from our seats. Onions!