If A.J. Burnett gets lit up again tonight it will come as no surprise. If he pitches reasonably well, nothing shocking. In fact, the only thing that would turn heads lies behind Door Number Three, if he pitches well, and not only that, but deep into the game. He’s won just one game in his last ten starts so the odds are against him. But let’s go against the grain, go beyond hope, and dream a little dream.
Get at of your head, Numbnuts and go git ’em.
Derek Jeter SS
Curtis Granderson CF
Mark Teixeira 1B
Robinson Cano 2B
Nick Swisher RF
Andruw Jones LF
Jesus Montero DH
Russell Martin C
Eduardo Nunez 3B
Chuck and Duck (ahem, Scott Proctor is back) and Let’s Go Yank-ees!
[Photo Credit: Icekingg]
Woo hoo, we is saved, Jesus is here!
On a good note, my grade level partner and I are talking about a field trip to Cooperstown.
On a bettter note. Praise Jesus!
2) Nice!
(I love this Leiter guy.)
Jesus has come!!
Jazz Princess has hid the remote control so I only got the Japanese announcers on tv this morning..not that bad.
Go Go Cano!!
Omg.
Robbie, watch it!
Whoo-hoo. The 'ol swim move.
(I fucking love this Robinson Cano, btw.)
Cano would hit 50 doubles a year if he played in Fenway, what a swing!
Yay and phew, Robbie!
[9] He's the real thing.
That's the only run AJ is going to need.
Can't let Lester off the hook here, got to plate those two..
Atta boy, Swish, hang in...nice and easy...
That's it, Swish, just put the motherfucker in play...
Good swing!
Swisher's ability to go 3-2 is just incredible.
[17] It is.
Ahhhh, fuck.
Fuck a duck!
It's going to be up to the kid...
30+ pitches for Lester..got to get those runs in too though!! Cmon Andruw!
Shut up, fuckwad.
Damn, Swisher and Andruw both swung at ball four..
Just don't stand there and stare at Uncle Charlie on 3-2.
Jesus on deck..I'm a junior high school girl, week in the knees..
Let's go, kid!
Oh, boy! Here we go.
Let's go, Jesus!
Luis Sojo's compatriot.
No pressure kid
Good eye, kid.
Good eye!
Good cut, good cut...
A bases loaded walk would be really nice.
Rats!
Welcome to the majors, Jesus..that savior act may work out in Springfield, but this is Captial City!
Oh well.
Least we made him work.
Hey, one inning in the books for AJ!
Stupd BR facts of the night. Sorry. Wins and losses. Everyone's most hated stats. : )
This is the 9th time AJ has thrown with Alfonso Marquez behind the plate. He is 3-4. This ranks 2nd only to Jim Wolf and 10. He has pitched with 88 different home plate umps. His best record AND most wins are with Ed Rapuano at 5-1. He is 1-5 with Rob Drake.
Hey, look. It's Ugly!
Gotta fucking capitalize on the breaks, man.
HO!
What a break!
Let's go Mark.
Double steal. Fucking something.
Mark You fucking FAIL, a hole.
Jesus, another fucking popup.
Crud!
Teix has the goddamn yips! What's that 4 mile high infield pops in 2 days. Bollocks!
He looked over-eager. Work the count, brah!
Shitty job in both innings. This isn't a recipe for winning with this shithead on the mound.
I refused to get sucked in today. I must not have hope. I must not believe. I must go to work. I...ah, heck, just one more inning.
Here we go with the lead off walk, watch...
They should name a new product at Good Humor...the Tex Pop.
He is really frustrating to watch lately (but not on the field).
Don't fall behind 3-1, shitbag!
Stop fraternizing, Derek.
AJ/two scoreless innings. September Song.
[54] I wonder if anyone on the Yankees actually hates Papi? At least Joba knew enough to take out Youkilis..
[56] Papi is the Latin Toastmaster of baseball. He thinks everyone loves him. He disgusts me, spitting into his batting gloves before every pitch.
Fuck, just missed.
[57] Not to mention standing and looking at his home runs. Just run the bases. Act like you've done it before and are going to do it again. A bit of enthusiasm is fine if you don't do it on a regular basis.
[57] But if you listen to him talk, he's a pea brain...at least in English. The dude is dim.
If Montero hits a HR, does John Sterling say, Jesus Rises Again?
Good swing, kid.
Fuck big papi.
Nerts. Wonder if Montero would have some Doobie Brothers as his walk up music.
YOU SUCK JESUS!
LAST TIME I SACRIFICE A CHICKEN TO YOU!!!
[60] Most non-Mussina ballplayers are a bit thick though, aren't they?
Lester is off today and they are not taking advantage..
[61] And in the third inning, He rose again! Jesus launches one into the celestial spheres! Jesus Christ, you can hit, Jesus!
[67] Hilarious!
[68] Boat, AJ is looking sharp..I may have to get the natto and One Cup sake ready...
[67] Excellent!
[66] Nova, even with his broken English makes salient points in interviews. Granderson seems pretty smart, as does Martin. I would say that Damon was the dimmest of all.
[64] I'd go with Norma Greenbaum.
AJ's motion is so fluid, stuff still nasty..I don't get it.
[70] Yeah, my comment was unfair, hard to get past the clice-speak with these guys to know if they gots brains or not.
[68] And of course, if he jacks one on Friday, "Ohhh, Good Friday came early this year, Jesus nails one, and I don't mean to the Cross!!"
Millar has a mic in the Red Sox broadcast and he's very funny. He is calling Franconna "Ben Franklin" and he just held a $100 bill and showed it to the dugout.
We have all seen this movie before.
[71] "Jesus is just alright with me"
Lester is going to wind up going 6+ which is a bullshit after his 1st inning.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...........
[70] Agreed. And Tex seems to have a good head on his shoulders. I like hit Hart Schaffner and Marx radio spot. He actually does a nice job with the V/O.
[76] bingo.
[72] Shhh, don't jinx A Burnt Jet.
What is clice-speak?
Ok, it's time to bust out.
[80] I think he meant "cliché".
[76,79] I got a friend in Jesus.
Here we go...
"SOMETIMES" he unravels, Kay? How about "Always"?
tickticktickticktickticktickticktickticktickticktickticktickticktick
What's with this strike zone?
boom
*sigh*
AJ, you are an asshole. An asshole.
And there's your ballgame, folks.
Don't fucking fall behind all the time you intolerable sack of suck.
Actually Suzyn, sometimes you CAN predict baseball!
[83] For a Seventies stoner band, they knew their religion. So did The Band.
Ah, the A.J. Shit the bed inning.
Who do I hate more? AJ or My Little Pony?
[90] And fuck our offense, too.
[93] Hahahhahahahaha!!!!
Such a dumb fucking pitch.
Nice hustle, Fat Man.
It's not even upsetting anymore, they are just the better team. Maybe I don't understand the advanced stats but if your team goes 3-12 against your main rival..how can you be considered "equals"?
[90] But tonight, really, he deserves more run support. The offense is not doing it's part.
Did anyone see the Jason Bay for AJ trade idea in one of the NY rags last week or so? Both have 2 years left and about the same money. Makes sense to me.
uh...its...
Wow!
Good work, AJ!
Actually, nice job by AJ not to implode.
Bust of a series for Mark so far.
At least someone's hitting.
Someone wore his hittin' shoes. Damn is he something!
Cano's swing is a thing of beauty.
Swish, please don't bunt!!!
Out of all of my comments tonight the last one is in moderation. Whaaaa?
What. The. Fuck!
Well in the name of God's Green Earth are you FUCKING DOING?
Wtf?
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??!!!
Inconceivable! Guy is hot. Has 21 HRs. Someone please "splain that to me.
109) There are a host of words that trip up SPAM and "shoes" happens to be one of them. That's why it was caught.
I'll explain it to you, Swisher had his head in his ass.
Brain cramp. We all have them. But bad timing to have one.
C'mon, KID
It's time for a miracle.
Tough, 1-0 pitch.
FUCK, that was the pitch. Now Lester's got him.
[117] Gotcha. Weird. Somewhere Joe Jackson is rolling in his grave.
C'mon, Kid!
Wow, fastball. I'm convinced he's going back to bury something low and in.
Thanks, Nick.
Not smiling now are you, Nick?
Grumble.
Bleh.
And *that's* why I'm an atheist ...
That's on you Swish you flakeshow. What a waste.
Can Burnett get six more outs without screwin' the pooch? If he does, Yanks are winning this shit.
I had to step out, did Swish actually bunt?
I see Rudy's here with his granddaughter.
I have to remind myself, all I wanted from this game was for AJ to hit two batters before he was removed/ejected.
1 down
131) Yeah, he bunted. I'm guessing he thought there was no outs when there was one.
Breath through your eyelids, Meat.
[132] Good god..what else can happen next then?
[135] I hate the bunt with the runner on first, let alone second.
So close to being great. Got to get the out.
Well, we love Tex for his glove, not his bat. Wait, what?
Don't worry about the runner, AJ. Get the guy in the effin' box.
That was a strike for godsakes!
Time to hold your breath.
NICE!
At least Swish didn't fall down rounding third missing out on an inside the parker.
http://mlb.mlb.com/video/play.jsp?content_id=18679943
Don't want to do it, but I've got to root against The Vulture here.
There you go, Russ. LET'S GO.
Hey, Nunie, be smart. Don't suck.
GOT TO BE kidding me.
WHoo-hoo. Double play.
[145] That is a funny video.
Hey 5 innings of two run ball from A.J., I'll take it
Man, this is a frustrating night, worse than AJ getting pounded. Ditto last night. Games that are winnable they are finding ways not to capitalize. Now, AJ is in his danger zone. He must hold it together. Just 3 more outs.
Hey Hey, it's a "Fallacy of the pre-determined outcome" sighting!
[151] Nope, AJ's going 6 more ... AND he's getting the win.
Just the way it's gonna be.
Hey Mark, you've done exactly JACK BOIL SCRATCH in this series. Redemption time, Papi.
152) Yeah, someone should be careful teaching Mike the fancy terms, cause he drives them into the ground.
Montero will win the game with an RBI shot off the Green Monster.
Ouch.
Ouch. Even that one popped straight up.
Well, better than a popout ...
Fuck the Sox, really. What's the current ratio of Sox:Yankees hit? As soon as AJ loses it, I want to see him pitching way up and in.
Yes, I'm mad.
Got to have a good AB, now, Robbie. No excuses now.
Stay hot, Robbie. For love of all who banter. Please!
Fuck Hit the Shit Sox
I'm calling SLASHER off the monster ...
#@!@#$!#$!@#$!@#$@#%@#%@$%@#$%#@%#@$%@#$%@$#@#$!#%@#%@
Misery thy name is us.
[164] FUCK. Well, I called the SLASHER part.
URGE.
TO.
KILL.
RISING.
See, this is where Boston is playing lucky. That was a bullet.
Lotta LOB tonight.
How many have they left on now, 10, 15?
He hit it hard. Bad luck.
170) 47
[170] Naw, can't be 47, that's the magic number of the universe.
Turns out it's 12.
Beautiful change by AJ there.
Fucking pest piece of shit. Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Looked out to me.
If this goes full just hit him.
I honeslty and truly believe Jeter sucks at receiving throws and tagging on steals.
C'mon AJ, hold it together, man.
STRIKE 3
It's the right move because AJ hasn't shown the balls to get out of these spots.
please god, please don't let it be boone logan,
One bad pitch from AJ. But when you are behind 99% of the time that shit is going to bite you in the ass. Bollocks! Time for a 2 run triple from Crawford.
Now I have to watch the NESN commercial with pigeons pooping on Yankees hats too? There's not enough alcohol in the world for this. Certainly not enough in my house.
[183] For once I get to write ... this one's NOT on AJ.
Not a great start, not even really good, but better than mediocre.
0-2, let's go Boonie.
NICE
[186] Better than Hughesey last night.
Make of that what you will ...
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!
Another change already? Why do I love this sport?
First pitch to Lowrey looked good.
Just as I suspected, there is no god.
Yes!
Atta boy, Curtis! Wow!
Holy cow. Granderson is unreal this year.
Well, thank G-- for that.
Shit I missed it and no reply.
M.V.P!
M.V.P!!
M.V.P!!!
Don't bunt!
The freeze cam made Curtis look like he was diving on the Brady's back lawn.
[200] For a Joe Namath pass?
Strike out swining on ball 4. Caugh looking at strike 3. Bunting when you think there are no outs. What the hell was in your Red Bull tonight Swish. Bah!
[202] Typing fail. Too angry to self-edit.
Long ab...
Jones is having some great ABs tonight.
A mess o foul balls
14 pitch at bat.
I want to see Jesus and Salthead stand next to each other. You know, b/c one is too big to catch and the other is so amazing.
Montero looks really nervous.
1-0, missed his pitch to hit.
Why is Dickerson there over Gardy?
Really? I think he looks cool.
Yes, Jesus, you can go to first now. LOL
At some point the Yankees HAVE to hit someone on the Sox..this is ridiculous.
[214] Uh, because?
That pitch A) barely hit Jesus and B) 100% wasn't intentional.
[208] The Royals have a huge catcher. Salvador Perez, or something like that? I saw him in spring training, and on his knees, he was as tall as some of the shorter players, I swear. He's listed as 6'-3", but I think that was when he was signed at 17. He's gotta be bigger than that now.
[215] At least pitch them off the plate then? How many times have we seen Yankees get hit at risk of serious injury?
Oh no it's DBard..
I don't really give a crap about whether The Jesus can catch, I just want him to mash like the unholy love-child of Edgar Martinez and Frank Thomas.
Position be damned.
[217] Jesus had to be told to go to 1st, that's how hard it hit him.
two nasty sliders.
[216] Jesus looks slimmer than I imagined. Salvador Perez. That's a good name.
[219] Look, I was just itching to make a "Jesus got NAILED by that one" joke and ... I just couldn't.
[219] One sample. Look at the #s over the last several seasons. Sox AGAIN lead the lead in hits batsmen.
They aren't going to hit Bard..
[211] C-Dick is very speedy. Maybe they're saving Gardy for later use? LIDR, maybe?
217) Yeah it wasn't on purpose. Neither was the curve to Tex.
[22] That''ll be your cross to bear.
[226] Man I suck. That's for [222].
FUCKING A SHIT. HOT DAMN!
BODIEBODIEBODIE!!!
YESYESYES!!!
YEAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! COLTRANE!!!!!!!
MUSCLE!
Woot!
Get him home, Chavie.
They're ALIVE!
Onions!
OH YES!!!!!! They're roughing up Bard!!!
Chavez has raked this series.
Chavey!
[234] Gimme 5 Bees for a quarter!
Throw strikes!
Okay, Soriano, Robbie, and Mo need to step up.
Tex is out.
SoRoMo!
Gardner is saving Sori's ASS out there.
Don't you guys want to see Proctor? lol....
[244] I can't believe Everyday Scott Proctor is back!
Man, that last pitch was....close.
[224] Yes. I want to see Proctor throw at Big Liar's head....like he did to Youk.
Got to put away Marco here.
Nice hook. Way to go Oh Sullen Soriano Face.
Suck on that, Scutaro.
Some insurance runs, maybe just a couple two, three would be lovely.
Still can't believe they signed Soriano to that salary..for the 7th inning..
[252] When the Steinbrothers and Randy Levine get involved, anything's possible ...
Way to get on base, Grittner.
252) Well, to be fair, they signed him thinking it'd be the eighth...
Score a bunch.
Oh, Brett.
You suck at the base running, Brett. Fuck.
Meh.
Should have just tried to out run the throw to 2nd.
Riveting commentary right now from the YES lads..
Swish should have stayed in bed this morning.
Millar AND Ugly. boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Ro!
This inning might make my head explode.
Hey Dave, it doesn't always need to be dramatic. Throw STRIKES.
Tough 0-1 curve.
Nice hustle, Russ.
OOOOOOH.
Rats.
He was out. Fuck.
Oooo he was out!
Kenny just said "Ties are for Xmas".. :)
SHUT YOUR FACE AND BAT, PAPI! Guy is always whining about something.
12-6. Yowzer. Throw that one again.
YES. What was that, five or six curve balls in a row? That's confidence.
Back to the bench fatty.
When you're the ALABAMA HAMMA, EVERYONE looks like a nail
Oh, just missed that 2-0 fastball. Just a little late.
2-1 cheese right passed him. 96.
Man, HAMMA hitting 96 tonight ...
Fouls off two heaters, that's four fastballs in a row. Curve next?
Curve, indeed, and fouls it off.
Fastball, 95, fouled back. Tough at bat.
C'mon HAMMA, hurt 'em ...
Curve, foul. The fastballs are getting the fat part of the plate. D Rob needs to be careful.
[283] He's TOO Legit 2 Quit!
Nice. Fastball, this one low and inside, and he pops him up.
Not the prettiest inning, but that'll do, HAMMA, that'll do.
Phew.
Close to a cheap shit dinger.
OK, big Mo. Show 'em how it's done.
Here we go, Mo...
It goes where it goes.
Dammit, MO, don't lose him.
Fuck.
Oh, Christ.
Of course. : (
One out. Sit down, Fenway.
One out.
Oh, man, that got too much, plate.
Crowd noise scared me there..
Mo's not looking right ... I hope the cutter hasn't left him forever
Oh, man, and that 2-1, right down Braodway.
Fuck you, Salty.
ONe more...
Sit down, Saltbrain.
Fastball, low, strike one. Cutter, inside, ball one.
Cutter, low and inside, fouled off, 1-2.
Fastball, up and in, ball two.
Come on, Mo. Finish him!
Fastball, outside. Framed, but outside, full count.
Cutter, inside, fouled off again.
I thought it was "onward, ho"
Two walks?
Fastball, outside, ball four. Runners on first and second, tying run on first, for Marco Scutaro, and old nemesis.
Mo and Jesus in the same park. The universe is out of balance. Cripes!
312) Play on the term. SJ Perelman once wrote a book called "Eastward, Ha!" Instead of "Eastward, Ho!"
Cutter, close, but "clips the outside corner," says Michael Kay.
I wonder if Mo has ever had a two walk inning that ended we well
Puke time. Motherfucker!
Ack.
Marco Scutaro..really...
Cheap shit single to right. Bases juiced. A Gone. Game on the line.
Holy shite.
[316] Ok, all is right in the world. Oops except the bases are loaded
Oh Jesus.
I feel ill.
Yeah ENOUGH with the Marco Scutaro kryptonite!
I fucking hate this ballpark
Whoooooosshhhhhhhhh. Agon's going for it.
Sweatin' it out here ... even with the AC going ...
Come on, MO!
PLEASE!
Almost hit him. Christ
Man, he's coming close to hitting him.
All Rise.
YESSS!
Oh, fucking A!
Goddamn, that was just too much.
Laptop is such a dirty looking human being.
THANK CHRIST
Mo vs Gonzalez...
Pitch One: Cutter, low and in, swing and a miss. 0-1.
Pitch Two: Cutter, inside, fouled off, 0-2.
Pitch Three: Cutter, inside, almost hits him in the leg, 1-2.
Pitch Four: Cutter, up and in, almost hits him in the hands, late swing, fouls it off his body, 102.
Pitch Five: Fastball away. This time he nails it. Strike Three. Suck it, Gonzo. Close pitch, but that's a call Mo is going to get.
Back door MAN.
Hard to laud Mariano too much after loading the bases but that was a nice pitch
Jeez, that was nerve-wracking.
And ... exhale.
Can't we just have an easy win?
Jesus.
I don't need this, man.
I don't need this.
Awfully quiet out there now. Drink it in bitches.
And the Yankees have a winning regular season
[341] Not a chance. But I like these 4hr30min games. Got a lot of laundry, dishes, vacuming, cleaning and mail chores done!
Josh Bard
good feeling
At the end of the day, the Yanks needed to win a series against this team. The fact that it was at Fenway is nice but really, they needed to WIN
Plus sized win.
just getting home from work. i heard the 9th inning in the car. damn.
sterling roared when he said "WIN"!!!
my throat hurts from screaming in the car : )
[341] [342] You think this is bad, wait until October if its another Yanks-Sox ALCS.
Praise be to Mo - I still can't believe I finally got to see Montero in the bigs with the Yanks. Not a fantastic start, but I'm sure he'll do better next game.
I hope the Yanks don't see that toilet bowl of a "park" until 2012.
350 and 352) AaaaaaaMEN. Night all.
Nice, 2 wins in Boston. Take that anytime.
Mo was squeezed, but he did give up two walks, and got the benefit of the call on the final strike to AGon.
Love Russell Martin! AJ moved the needle towards the positive (but he has a long way to go). Swish really fucked up, and I'm sure he will be heavily penalized in kangaroo court.
Three long games, exciting baseball for those who love it, no so much for the casual fans.