So much for easing into the season. Yesterday, Joe Girardi and Joe Maddon had their thinking caps on, the Yanks left the bases loaded three times and Mariano Rivera blew a save.
Tonight, Hiroki Kuroda makes his Yankee debut against the formidable David Price.
We’ll be here root-root-rooting away.
Let’s Go Yank-ees!
[Photo Credit: Associated Press]
There damn well better not be any IBBs!
Off to the Mud Hens.
Derek Jeter DH
Nick Swisher RF
Robinson Cano 2B
Alex Rodriguez 3B
Mark Teixeira 1B
Curtis Granderson CF
Andruw Jones LF
Russell Martin C
Eduardo Nunez SS
cabrera with a quick 2-run homer off fuckett in the first!
Hey folks, today's my official Opening Day (aka a nutheryearonearth) and my roommate's taking me out for dinner to celebrate, so enjoy the game without me (which from what I can tell is reeeeeal easy to do), but do me a favor and make sure the team wins today while I'm out (yunnow, send out brainwaves to crush Girardi's skull if he tries to play chess with Kasparov over there...) Enjoy! >;)
[4] happy b-day, cyhll!!! i'm too sick to make sure we win, but i hope our pinstriped heroes give you a proper present!
3) Fuckbucket. Indeed.
4) Happy boitday, papi!
I didn't see Kuroda throw one pitch this spring. I am anxious to see what he's got.
Hah, I was born a couple days before Chyll Will. Hm, probly a couple days plus a few years. More than probly.
Have a fistful of matzot on us, Will!
Whoa, I missed the beginning of the Red Sox game. (My kid was playing some on-line game on the tv.) I missed some good stuff!
Fister is hurt. I didn't catch what happened. Anyone know?
[8] happy belated, RI!
my throat is too raw for matzoh...
[9] yeah, fuckett's given up 2 dingers, 5-0 kittens!
[10] no one knows yet. he had a sore right middle finger in spring training. could be that...?
oof, i didn't know uecker's 52-year old son died yesterday. sad. : (
[11] Hey, my throat is a bit sore too. But you can't pass up the chance to use the plural 'matzot'. I love that word.
Maybe Fister re-injured his middle finger flipping off Pedroia.
Yeah, saw that about Uecker earlier.
Dang, Prince Fielder. Don't worry, Josh. You'll be fine. Just keep chucking it.
this is beautiful.
back-to-back jacks for cabrera & fielder. they've each hit 2 homers today off fuckbuckett!!!
This Red Sox game is highly entertaining. Hit the showers, Beckett!
I hope Avila hits it to Aviles.
[12] i did notice the pluralization and appreciated it! my goyish girl is on the hunt for matzoh ball soup to bring me. i haven't been sick in a year. this sucks. weh...
yeah, there was definitely a flipping off joke in there, glad you made it for me!
have a good seder, ri. ma nishtana!
i hope avila hits a 2nd homer. then it'll be deuces wild for him, cab & prince.
three of a perfect pair!
I also hope Josh is enjoying some KFC right now. No beer allowed, but maybe Schilling can sneak some in for him.
Oh, [16] thanks man, you too.
Matzoh ball soup, perfect! Hard to find in Atlanta?
let's go with Popeye's - i don't want the good name of Col. "Sanders" associated with fuckbuckett and the shit sox! : )
better yet, it's Easter weekend - let's go with Church's Fried Chicken!
[19] no seder for me. it's at my brother's in Queens... my parents are in Scotland. amazingly, my mom is somehow keeping kosher for pesach.
well, i live around the block from the Orthodox area here in Atlanta. that said, all the Judaica places are gonna be closed right now. she'll probably improvise and just find me some good chicken soup. whole foods, maybe. who knows, anything will be fine, really...
Right, some chicken soup from Whole Foods, break the affi koman into it like it was a saltine, that'll do it!
Beckett & Co are already associated with your proud name, I'm afraid. I don't know if it really was KFC, but that's how the press reported September's debacle.
Imagine Prince when he comes to the "friendly confines" of Yankee Stadium III?
Shudder...
[23] Yeah, the whole team, not just Prince. That's a good team.
[22] i actually have saltines in the pantry. if i find one, will you send me afi koman gelt?!
oh, boo. didn't realize it was my surname. that sucks...
Fister's injury: strain in left side. i bet chip caray wishes he was announcing the game...
[25] Wait, you didn't realize it was your surname? Damn. I knew musicians were kind of spacy, but damn.
Sure, man, I'll send you the gelt, no problem. What's a saltine, anyway, besides a little matzoh? A matzeluh.
Man, what a beating this one is...
I am stoked to watch Hiroki tonight. Also fear that D. Price is going to be great.
Going to the game this morning, it's cherry blossom time over here! Sit under the trees, picnic, beer, karaoke!
Happy B-Day Chyll!!
[27] it's the cold medicine that's making me spacey! prolly using dangling participles and such.
kfc - my surname, yes. in conjunction with the shit sox clubhouse - didn't realize...
[28] wish i could see the game on tv. i like hiroki...
GO YANKS!!!
double digits for the tiggers. me likey.
let's hope the yanks put up some crooked #'s tonite!
Hey everybody - happy baseball! Sounds like I missed a hell of an opportunity to scream at Girardi yesterday.
[30] thelarmis, do you have MLB network? They are showing the game tonight - that's how I'm seeing it.
[32] i don't. that said, i actually need to call comcast right now about some digital equipment they're now requiring. it's possible i end up with the station by the end of the phone call. we'll see...
Ooh, nice, double digits.
I have mlb.tv. I think it's actually better than MLB network, if you have a good internet connection.
shit sox lose 10-0
: )
Meredith Marakovits? Sounds to me like a name from Happy Days.
Here we go.
37) LOL. She's white knuckling that microphone so far but that's understandable, it's a new gig, an intimidating gig.
I don't know why they insist on hair extensions though. Maybe because she's got a round face and they figure shorter hair wouldn't work as well.
GO JETES!
Sad single!
That's low, Blue!
I hope he gets tired of missing the zone and grooves one to Tex.
What are you looking at, Teix?
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh kay.
Again, didn't he talk all about how he wanted to go the other way this year?
Or was that only from the left side?
That was impressive against Mark.
Of, FFS!
Now it's his glove, too?
Nune6 in midseason form.
That was a nice pitch.
Good throw, too.
93mph.
Nice play, Alex.
So far I've seen Kuroda throw pitches at 83 and 78...are those both changeups?
Bah. So close. Shut 'em down Kuroda.
He likes to throw it first pitch, too.
Damn it.
FUCK.
Good hitting, wasn't a bad pitch.
Damn.
All right, then.
That was a nasty breaking pitch. Damn.
Yeah, I think that first inning was the Big Chance to get to Price.
Wtf was that shit?
Jesus!
Off topic from Marc Carig:
The reasoning behind the Yankees' trade for Chris Stewart: On the surface, the Yankees' acquisition of Chris Stewart makes little sense, especially because Francisco Cervelli is a far better hitter. But it turns out the Yankees have one big reason for doing the deal -- they put stock in new research that suggests that catchers who can frame pitches might be extremely undervalued. Which explains why they targeted Stewart. “He's one of the better ones that do it,” Joe Girardi said.
Just the let the fucking pitcher catch it. Bollocks!
We had a lot of fielders near that ball.
Goddampena.
Hiroki's heater is cock-high...ugh.
[64] I also heard Girardi loves the way Stewart holds his arm out straight as an arrow on IBB's.
Dammit. 3-0.
Fuck off Evan.
[64] Interesting. I'm glad they're thinking about stuff like that.
Nice hit, Derek.
Two sad hits.
Way to go DJ.
Hit it on the screws...
Oh are you kidding me?
Fiucking Joyce asshole standing right there.
Robbie keeps looking at the first pitch fastball.
[77] He thought it was Ibanez.
"For him! For Raul!"
(That is an incredibly obscure joke, but I figure Weeping has a shot at it.)
Well this sucks.
Oh, fuck me!
Hello All! Thanks again Alex for the place.
Baseball! Not feeling so good so far. NunE6.
At least the Yanks are hitting the ball hard. But so is Matt Joyce.
Happy Birthday Chyll!
Why is the clock still an hour behind on the posts? Do I have to do something on my end?
Riverrun.
[82] i asked about the clock too and got a wise crack from RI! : )
i think it's just protesting against daylight savings...
[79] Alas, no, and after that dinger, I'm too cranky to care.
Nice dp, boys.
Missed the beginning of the game. See Nunez still can't field.
I'm sure the Yankees will tell us we're mistaken.
[84] What do you expect? Rhode Island is 5 years and one hour behind.
Dag, Hiroki. Tough night. He's got nothing so far.
Fucking hell, these people are positioned perfectly.
[85] http://tinyurl.com/forraoul
I read that book at a very impressionable time of life, and that is a... lusty section.
AND WHEN YOU HAVE A DYNAMO LIKE EDUARDO NUNEZ, HOW CAN YOU *NOT* PLAY HIM?
[88] ???
Yanks have hit a few balls hard here the past two innings.
Nice cut by A. Jones on that 2-1 pitch.
Yay!
Very nice job.
Nice job, Andruw.
That was all arms.
Attaboy.
[93] Just teasing, as a response to your chide directed to Eric about the site clock.
I would like some coffee milk and stuffies. As a family we're going to Providence soon to check out Brown for my son.
[91] you need to read this book:
http://tinyurl.com/c6mmjbu
!!!
C'mon, Nuney!
[102] Why? Just because of its title?
Yaaaaayyyy, Nunez!
NUNEY!!!!
More Yay!
Man, that's really good hitting.
All is forgiven!
(Not really, but what the hell.)
Keep it going, Derek!
[104] yeah. we've spoken about that book before. you were excited. it's a cool music notation guide...
Derek's not going to get around on that fastball.
[111] Lemme know when it comes out on Kindle.
Except he did. That was nice.
Oh well.
Some bad luck tonight. Hitting it right at guys. But the Yanks are on Price now.
C'mon Hiroki, 1-2-3, let's go.
Lucky Price.
Nice play, Curtis.
Kuroda seems very unpredictable as far as sequence.
Nice work, Kuroda.
Nice start, Swish.
Sigh.
Not the way to get the pitch count up.
Damn it.
Well that sucked.
Lead off walk...
Nicely turned, boys.
Nice couple of innings here by Hiroki, limiting the damage.
"Driven deep to left field, backing up Joyce...track, wall..."
"Fat, fuck."
Kay's taking Sterling lessons, going into his pre-made home run call too early. Dildo.
[128] :))
FUCK FUCK FUCK.
doubled to death...
Drag.
Kuroda's four questions:
Why is this division is unlike any other?
Why do I keep shaking off my catcher?
Why are the Rays teeing off on the first pitch of the AB?
Why am I feeling pressure the second day of the season?
Well how about that.
[133] Heh.
Wherefore, kinda thing.
Be big to get out of this here.
That was aascary. Maybe it will settle Kuroda down. His body language and scowl is problematic.
That's Kuroda's natural expression. Same look as when he's doing well. I wouldn't read anything into it.
Did Cervelli put a Santeria curse on the Yankees?
Plus, Yanks are still coming back to win this one.
He can't do a rundown, either?
Fucking Nunez.
Nunez! For fuck's sake he almost screwed that up.
Ah ha! Nice.
Big Rally, let's GO!
I think Nunez needs to be converted into an outfielder.
He's insufferable out there.
How in the fuck did they turn two on that?
Jesus Christ.
Grrrrrrrrr.....
Tough night.
Good work, Kid.
This game is horse shit.
I hate to say it, but that should be a HR.
Waah! At least there are another 160 more contests to go. Shudder to think, the Mets are right now the leading team in NY.
Rapada's shittiness has completely changed my Banter layout. WTF?
The Yankees seem as tight as a _____________ (you pick the cliche.
[153] Scratch that. I ended up with the mobile version somehow. Now I'm back to normal but the game is still a big back of bollocks.
Not so sure I will be able to take a lot of Lou...love him, but his weaknesses as a broadcaster are becoming readily apparent. It was funny when he and Singleton were together with Kay and the old ballplayers reduced MK's status to copy reader.
Why was Rapada in to face a righty? Is the bullpen already depeleted? Was Kuroda as bad as the box score suggested?
OK, Yanks will definitely came back against this worthless piece of crap.
There's the Robbie I know and love.
Missed alot getting ready for Easter. I see Joe's in mid season form with Rapada.
Just got in to see 2nd and 3rd, no out, and the heart of our order up. Holy mother of God... I should have stayed at work.
Hmm.
Kaboom!
Good thing we blew those runs in the 8th inning.
Gardner to save the day?
Oh well. Get them tomorrow.
It's amazing, that it seems no matter how far behind we are, we can bring the tying run to the plate... only to fall short. Fuckiddy.
[166] At least they made it interesting in the end. Lots of but fors in this game. But for Nune6's error in the first, Swisher's HR would have tied the game. But for the Yanks failing to score in the 8th, Swisher's HR would have given the Yanks the lead. Etc.