[0] Is that the Bat phone?

Gotta crush these bird-brained jokers.

There's our Batman. Judge, jury and executioner. The Jays have been sentenced.

I hate toronto.

Not an ideal situation here. Bats need to do some damage the next few innings.

So Boonie is a genious for taking King out yesterday?

Woo-hoo!

Ballsy send or stupid? Worked out. Yikes.

Stupid. They were Lucky he wasn’t thrown out by four steps. They already lead the league in runners thrown out at the plate by a large argon. .

So who do we have lined up for the 6, 7, 8 and 9th.
Holmes, Wandy, Green, Chappie?

They've bounced Abreu to wherever.

Severino.

Where TF was that “strike”?

Long Live Stanton!

UNSTOPPABLE!

Stanton is en fuego.

This is the Giancarlo we've been waiting for. Dear god. Why does anyone pitch to him right now?

Maybe Stanton could ask the Jays if he could borrow their homer jacket.

It doesn't even look like he's swinging that hard. Amazing.

Stanton’s on the bench asking his teammates why the opponents are even still pitching to him.

Can't stop. Won't stop.
Gio Power!

Gio-Blast-Ova (da fence)

I just noticed that Boston lost in Baltimore. Yikes. Tailspin?

Only a double? Stanton is slipping.

Gallo to the gallows.

Noice win. Keep it goin'.

[17] That's what gets me about Stanton. His swings seem effortless, but clearly aren't. No one in baseball hits the ball harder, but look at his follow through. His bat never gets close to his back. It's like he's just chopping at the ball, and then it travels 450 feet. I've been watching baseball for forty years, and I don't think I've ever seen a player who can look so lost at the plate -- swinging at sliders that are in the opposite batter's box -- and then so absolutely locked in.

And here's a great stat from the post game. Judge and Stanton each hit 8 or more homers and drove in 20 or more runs in August and then in September. Only the second pair of teammates in baseball history to do this. The others? Ruth and Gehrig.

[25] Well stated, but I've decided to forget about the awful swings outside the zone. ;>)

When he's in this groove, Stanton reminds me of Manny. Can't think of anyone else in the last couple of decades, at least. He hits it so hard and far that your mouth just drops open.

I hate to say this, but I'm still nervous. I could see these guys dropping four of the last five.
Come on, boys, prove me wrong!

Those uniforms. I swear for a second I saw Damaso Garcia racing into second base.

Damn.

Oh my god.
It's Weeping for Brunhilde!
I feel like I just saw a ghost!

hahahahaha!

[30]

Good evening, my old friend. :)

Ooooh, did you mean: ho jo to ho?

Yes. That's exactly what I meant.

Stupid is as stupid does:
Milwaukee Brewers reliever Devin Williams told reporters on Wednesday that he broke his pitching hand after celebrating the team's clinch of the NL Central on Sunday.

Per MLB.com's Adam McCalvy, Williams said that he had too much to drink during the celebration and punched a wall on his way home.

[34] Yeah I heard that.
My son sort of did that once. Only he wasn't drunk. But he was like 11. Cracked two knuckles.

Jesus, they're smacking the ball all over the place.

Hhahahaahahaha!!! Coney with his mom's dog!

Now would be a good time to reverse the pitching plan. This is my wild card game nightmare.

Looks like a rough one for Cole. Three runs, four extra base hits, lots of hard hit balls, only five outs.

[27] This is why the wild card game IS a nightmare.

Who's pitching today, Heaney?

Toronto has a great 1 thru 6. Check out their OPS.

Bad pitching and bad hitting. Not a good combo.

Is there anyone up in the bullpen?

That was fucking inside.

A good four inches

Got them right where they want them.

Four-nothing and we're not just being shut out, we're being perfect-gamed. Lovely.

A hit!

That was way inside!

Finally.

Doesn’t help when Berrios gets a free strike every few at bats.

I do like how fast Berrios pitches and the fact that he pitches stakes.

Yaayyyy!!

The Luis Sojo sixteen hop special (as Al Leiter would say).

Signs of life!

Yaaayyyyy!!!!

Nice hitting, Brett!

I do like Gardner at the bottom of the lineup. He has been hitting well after the all star break.

That's it, lay off those breaking balls!

Well, sure, mound visit.
"How are we going to handle the Mighty Kyle in this tense and dangerous situation?"

[58] laughing

Oh, give me a fucking break.

Gallo is supposed to be in there for his defense, right?

Sorry, Gerrit, you have to get 4 outs this inning.

Just awful.

Ok. This is it. This is our inning.

Nice hitting.

Keep chippin' away.

Swinging at 3-0? WTF Rizzo.

I mean, more would have been nice, obv, but I'll take that.

[66] (He took 3-0. Swung through 3-1.)

Oh well.

Not acceptable but better than nuthin'

[68] OK. Thanks for the fact check.

Whoa, RIYank, Boatzilla, Hank and Weeping keeping the thread going? IS this 2007 and my son was just born and Kei Igawa just gave up a homer??
Where are thelarmis and cultofbasebaal now for a full reunion..

Nice inning.

[72] smiling

Cole probably lost the CY.

[72] My daughter was also born in 2007. Lo these FOURTEEN years ago. Cra-ZY.

[76] Wild isn't it? I remember buying Jazz Jr a toddler's 2009 World Series shirt, now he's taller than Mrs. Jazz...Cole made it through 6, but a disappointing game. Time to get Scott Proctor in (Ok, I'll stop with the 2007 jokes now..)

Yay!

[77]. God. Good old Scott Proctor. :)

[77] Dude, take your money *out* of the stock market. I'm serious. You have about a year.

Damn it.

Luke Voit's final AB as a Yankee?

Stop swinging at that slider!

Hm.
PH for Brett sort of makes sense, but... why not save Luke to PH for Kyle?

Ohhhhh, it's a HIT!!!!!

Yaayyyyyyy!!!!!!

Gettin' Higgy with it.

And no sooner do I ask that question...!!!

Well Hell's bells! I like it.

東丘頑張れ！！ Our man 'East Hill' Higgy with the clutch single!
Still a mistake by Boone sending him up there though..result over process is lucky..!

[80] Some guy in a DeLorean told me to 'invest in the surgical mask market, just trust me..'

Heeeeere's Johnny!

Semien has 44 taters at 2B..?

Nice pick.

[92] Crazy, right?

[90] Yeah I'd wait on that, though. Also buy Zoom when it's invented.

Fuck.

Bishit!

I hate that fucker. Bollocks!

Wow!

Whoa!! Nice fucking play!

Dante Bichette really named his son 'Bo' and now he's killing us..

Gio with the leather. Go get one back.

Good to have Gleyber back as Gleyber

Hm.
The PH options are limited. That said, they haven't worked out well so far.

And so... it's all up to Tyler Wade.
Something you never really want to admit to yourself.

This Blue Jays team is annoying as fck

Ah well.
Good fight.

Let's win tomorrow, take the series from the Jays, and whittle down the magic number.

Bummer..Sox beating up the O's today too..

Bah.

Glad Kubler will be throwing to Higgy tonight. Interesting to see Gary in the lineup as well. Anyone know who the emergency catcher is?

Gallo out causes four righties in a row, but given the way Judge, Stanton, Gleyber have been swinging, it’s not a huge disadvantage.

GO YANKS. .

I will rise. Holy shite!

[111] Oh look, it's coming back to earth now.

Corey-on-Corey violence.

Lotta fly balls off our bats.

Lotta grounders.

I guess Robbie Ray is good. Still, this is kind of embarrassing. It's this kind of thing that was flashing through my mind when I said I could see this team blowing their playoff spot.

Hey! Dropping a line drive is a hit. Sweet.

Costly.

Could be worse, though. The Red Sox are getting trounced by the Orioles *again*. That is definitely more embarrassing.

Judge took Robbie Tight-Ass Ray deep? What happened with Kluber, hope Boone didn't leave him in too long..

Hell yes! Atta boy, Rizzo!

Corey gave up a lot of hits, but worked his way out of trouble mostly.
But we are only able to get the kind of hits that nobody (except the fans) can catch.

UNBELIEVABLE!!!!

Holy Jesus.
Well, if you're gonna get just three hits, I guess that's the way to do it.

Judgment Day!

Is Springer dancing right now?

Gleyber Day!

Because teams that rely on the home run can't win.

Also, I want a Homer Jacket right now. I want Gleyber to walk across the field and ask the Jays if he can wear it.

Whoo-hoo! Getting my dog all fired up.

[128] Not even one in-play hit!
I see your Truuuuuuue Outcomes shining through
I see your Truuuuuue Outcomes, and that's why I love you...

[130] Ha! My dog doesn't like when I'm watching sports. He took off as I was celebrating the Judge homer.

Do you think Stanton feels left out? I feel a little bad for him. I guess he did score at least.

Yup. Yogi was sound asleep on the couch until Judge's homer. Me jumping off the couch is not beneficial to him. Lol.

[133] I'm definitely feeling bad for him. Really hoping he joins the homer party later tonight.

Microcosm of a season.
See Rizzo HR, start going crazy.
Wife tells me to take the garbage out.
Start walking around with my iPhone trying to keep my eye on the game.
Get the garbage ready while Judge HRs.
Garbage is gone....go looking for it.
Wife has already taken it out.
Barely catch Gleyber's HR.

But I'm happy.

Look at Stanton! No outfield for three years, and now he runs that one down like it's nothing.

[131] Good one. Cindy!

Stanton! Good thing Gallo wasn't out there.

[136] Please write more poetry like this.

So is Voit hurt or is he totally out of The Circle of Trust?
We got 2 catchers in the game.

[141] Voit was put on the IL today. I know people are upset that he hasn't been playing, but I'm not a big fan of Voit. I don't miss him.

[140] Ha. I should be writing slogans right now. 12 noon deadline.

This ump fucking blows!

Kay is talking about Wade like he's a zero offensively.
He's not that bad. He's helped this team all year long. A few big mistakes on the base paths, but that's par for the course for this team.

Well, yeah, except base running is pretty much all Wade contributes, offensively.

Pearson has a strong “brings cocaine to a low key high school party when the parents are out (but not out of town)” vibe about him.

Severino is turning in this team's Devin Wiliams, minus the stupidity.

Don't let Luis pitch the 8th! Bring in Green. Fucking Bollocks!

lol Coney.
But I just realized, Michael is covering a game *in Toronto*.
I mean, the game is, not Michael.

Oh Chad....

[149] Hmmmmmmm.

Hmm....hanging curveball for Bo. Leadoff double.

Never feel good with Green on the mound anymore...

Looks a lot better now though.

"Alejandro Kirk" is a pretty cool name.

They need another run....for my heart.

[157] The big question is, do I make the 5-min trek out to the jerk chicken truck for lunch? Or order in? First World problems galore..

It just warms my heart that the Orioles took two of three from the Red Sox, when the Sox really needed (and expected) to walk over those birds.

Homer. Jacket. Right. Now.

The Blue Bombers!

(Extra points if you get that one)

[158] In this weather? Order in.
As my mom would say, "You'll melt." (Because I'm sugar)

[162] This Jerk Chicken truck is worth a bit of rain though..he packs it with coconut rice, avocado, buffalo sauce..

Get Loaisiga up.

Buckle up,Banterers.

[163] You're making my mouth water.

This game has taken far too GD long any event. Ugh.

Way to go Bombers.

Yup. Cheers, y'all.

[161] FYI. Answer: Winnipeg Blue Bombers of the CFL. Weak sauce? I tried.

Quick question for the masses. How have you felt about the Yankees' rivals over the years? (I ask because I despise the Blue Jays, even though I know my dislike is irrational.)

Starting with 1995, we've got the Mariners. Super villains, but I couldn't hate them, not really. Randy Johnson was easy to hate, but there was no hatred beyond that. Edgar Martínez gave me nightmares, but he was absolute vanilla, like a robot. See ball, hit ball, drive in run. Repeat. I loved Griffey, so everything he did against the Yankees -- and he did a lot -- was like a dagger, but it couldn't stop me from rooting for him when they weren't playing the Yankees.

Cleveland then became the main rival, but I don't really remember having any strong feelings about them. They were a great team, but that was about it.

The Red Sox, obviously. That era of the rivalry, 1998-2004, was the best it's been in my life time, especially when they unbalanced the schedule and they started playing nineteen times a year. Those games felt like playoff games, and I treated them as such, planning my schedule around them. Back then when the games were on MSG, the live game would be blacked out here, but the replay that followed immediately would air, so I'd avoid the score and watch it plausibly live. When YES took over, I started paying to watch live, and my quality of life suffered. Watching Manny and Papí back to back was awful. (Do opposing fans feel that way with Judge and Stanton?) But here's the thing -- I couldn't not like Manny. He was Manny. And Papí was okay. But there were so many villains back then -- Varitek, obviously. Youkilis. Pedro. Pedroia, later on. That was an easy team to hate, and not just because I was supposed to.

The Astros. The Astros make me question myself. I'm a grown man with grown children. I'm a molder of young minds. But I freely admit that I absolutely fucking hate the Astros. Carlos Correa. José Altuve. George Springer. Hate. Them. All. The cheating scandal isn't the reason, it's just a justification for the hatred that was already simmering. If the Yankees sign Correa in the off-season... I mean... He'd have to win two triple crowns to get on my good side.

Which brings us to the Jays. All they're doing is having fun playing the game, and I'm completely aware that if I were a Jays' fan I'd love them all to death. I can't be mad at Vlad, Jr., for anything he does; he's so good he should wake up pumping his fist and screaming at his reflection in the mirror. But there's Springer again -- his salsa shimmy made me ill the other night -- and Bichette. Ugh.

So am I a bad person?

Hate the Sox. Always
I was really anti Baltimore in those Jeffrey Maier years. That one brawl was pretty emblematic of my opinion of them.
Hated the Angels and Scioscia. So annoying.
Disliked the Juan Gone and Rusty Gree-ah Rangers
The Astros deserve a trip through every one of Dante’s circles
These Blue Jays are likable individually but that stupid home run jacket gets on my frickin nerves.

Kinda saw the Mariners and Indians as opponents but not nemeses. I was pleased however the year Seattle won 100+ games and the Yanks dispatched them summarily.

Not an ideal start.

Better.

Stanton going the other way for a RBI. Noice.

Gallo is not a terrible fielder.

Oh fer gosh sake.

Red Sox were easy to dislike, especially Schilling. Pedro was pretty amazing, but it was nice to rough him up occasionally. I thought Oritz was OK, but I never really liked full-time DH. I remember not liking the Braves so it was satisfying to beat them in 96 and 99. I disliked the Astros before the scandal and even more after. The one player that I really disliked was Roger Clemens. He was always my least liked Yankee and I was quite happy when he moved on to Houston.

[170] CFL! I was sure it was a drug reference..

[171] Sox always the worst, but I find I can’t stand the Dodgers these days. And increasingly the Rays and all their admirers who glorify them for finding cheap players. Never thought of the Mets as a rival though I know some do.

Nats loaded the bases with nobody out in the fourth.
Did not score.

[179] Quadrophenia?

I usually don't like celebrity (or any) booth visits, but Mo was good. Great to hear him talk about pitching.

Holmes is hard.

[184] See what you did there..

Maybe the fielders will get tired moving from outfield to infield.

A bloop and…

The Jays and Sox are both up 3-0. It would be really nice to pull this one out somehow. Need base runners!

:(

[156] I resisted the urge to talk about the Rays bringing in Head.

[190] One day I can’t wait to tell Jazz Jr that Dick Pole and Rusty Kuntz were actual baseball men..

[191] Har!

Jo-Lo gets it done!

Shin’ time folks.
Get after it.

Auto correct dammit

Dyin’ time.

The odds of hitting a two-run homer without someone getting on base first are very, very long.

Best 2 hitters in the ninth. Can't ask for more than that

Perplexing as always to see Boone’s bullpen usage..

Too many walks

This one was winnable.